We went to our first, honest to goodness, at the park playgroup today. It went better than I was expecting, but not as good as I hoped.
I was really scared to death to go, up late last night stressing and then spending all morning thinking through contingency plans. Trying to come up with ways to keep him involved with the other kids, prepared for whatever terrain we'd come across, able to play with all the equipment, if it weren't for the fact that the other moms are such wonderful, supportive, positive friends of mine, I probably would have just kept to my house.
Atti was a big fan of the swings, but the slide didn't do anything for him. Of course, he could only go down if he was on my lap, so that takes a little of the thrill away.
I brought his little walker, hoping that he'd try to use it to keep up with his little friends, but instead he just got pissed off. He recognized that the other boys could do things that he couldn't and it made him MAD. Head banging, full body fit throwing MAD. Which is good. I know him. This little guy is just so durned stubborn that he'll get mad and then he'll get to work. As we keep up with the playgroup, I think he will start using that walker more, and it will really aid his development.
But for today, I can't really describe the pit that opened up in my stomach as I watched my child realize he was different.
It's just my job to teach him that different doesn't have to be a bad thing.
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7 comments:
I reckon thats two more posts before you announce some big milestone, seems to be how it works round here.. go Atti...
He is gorgeous look at that happy face on the swing.
Anything to motivate him will work.
One step at a time Mom.
Diane
Oh from your mouth to God's ears Noonie, my friend.
You guys are the greatest.
I reckon he'll get his tushy in gear soon. It's no fun being different like that, I should know.
By the way, I was enthralled with swings over slides too. I can't swing much anymore because I start feeling a little queasy now! 18 years of pure swinging energy and at 20 I can't swing for more than five minutes now without queasiness. When did I grow old?
Love that picture of you two on the swing together!
I don't know if you remember me from GI or Zen & Chocolate but I have been following your blog for awhile and I just wanted to say I think you are the best mother! Your Atti is a blessed boy to have a mom like you!
Beth Larabee
This is the kind of post that makes me a better teacher. Your raw emotion in this post-be it fear or joy- has come back to me a few times this week and I really think that it has helped me to communicate in a more sensitive and informed way with my students parents. I have heard that having kids is like wearing your heart on the outside. Your posts remind me that the moms struggle,learn, fear right along with their children. I love your positive attitude.
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