Today’s a better day

The appointment yesterday actually turned out to be totally anticlimactic. He looked at my incisions, satisfied that I wasn’t infected, wrote me an injection order and got the hell out of there.

Although he couldn’t resist one last dig and asked me if I wanted a referral to a psychiatrist. By that time I’d spent so much time obsessing and analyzing I’d come to the conclusion that psychiatric help might not be the worst thing I could pursue. I’m not caving in to Dr. I’mnotlooking’s suggestions that the pain is in my head. I’ve just realized that living with a chronic disabling illness and infertility is extremely stressful, and if someone’s going to pay for me to talk to a therapist, why not? Therapists are so blooming expensive and getting insurance to cover it is such a chore, that Dr. I’mnotlooking may have accidentally handed me a real bonus.

Of course, the first thing I plan on covering with the shrink is Dr. I’mnotlooking.

As for my upcoming medical treatment, I’ll be getting an injection of Lupron once a month starting on the first day of my next cycle. Which means that I will shortly be going through menopause.

Part of me could not be more thrilled since I know it’s what will cure me, but I really don’t like the idea of hot flashes and night sweats. Bear has the night sweats enough for both of us. Once I start this medicine we’re going to have to change the sheets every night so we don’t sleep in puddles.

I have a friend who’s very in to herbal cures and I’ve been thinking about following her recommendations to reduce the menopause symptoms. Does anyone have any experience with this or know if it’s a problem to take anything while taking Lupron?

The pain from my lap is slowly disappearing, although my abdominal muscles still seem to be as weak as a baby kitten, but now that I’m weaning myself off the vicodin, I’m remembering all the pain that got me here in the first place. It is all kinds of suck that I have to deal with all my endo symptons and the lap symptoms. And as if that wasn’t enough, I seem to have come down with a cold. I’ve been laying in bed sniffing and coughing and moaning from the pain on my abs. Sniff, cough, moan. Sniff, cough, moan. Sniff, cough, moan. I’m just a world o’fun these days.

Now that I’m able to sit up more, I’m trying to inspire myself back into the creating. I’m almost done with a baby blanket I’ve owed my friend the good twin for nearly a year, and Bear’s brother is about to have his first, so I gotta get to work on that one, but I’ve also joined the “use what you have challenge” over at simplesparrow. The goal is to only make stuff with what you already own. No new purchases for the entire month of April. Between the yarn stash and the fabric hoard and the paper collection, I’m feeling this won’t be such a challenge for me. But hopefully it will get me moving on actually making some things.

Alright, that’s enough disjointed rambling for today. Back to bed.